Mrs. G., a single parent who is 70 years old, needed to have surgery. Unable to provide care for her daughter, who is in a wheelchair and has cerebral palsy, Mrs. G. was in critical need of services for the specialized care her daughter required. Mrs. G. contacted The Respite Inn, and her daughter stayed at The Inn for 2 weeks while Mrs G. recovered from her surgery.
Mr. C. recently lost his wife from a tragic car accident. Providing care for his daughter who has autism while at the same time grieving his wife’s death seemed too much to bear. Mr. C’s daughter now comes to The Respite Inn once a month. This gives Mr. C. time to recuperate and attend to his personal needs.
Mary, age 66 parent of April, age 45
Like many parents of disabled children, Mary and Lee agonized over whether to move their daughter, April, who needs round the clock assistance, to a group home. With full-time jobs and another, younger child, caring for April was taking a toll. When April was about 13, they decided to try “outside placement.” It wasn’t easy; they were deeply attached to their daughter. At the same time, they were exhausted.
The plan failed. April’s health and spirits deteriorated after a few months away. Pained, Mary and Lee moved their daughter back home, vowing to provide for her for as long as they could. “She got skinny; she got rashes, and I believe to this day she was abused,” Mary said. “I just knew something wasn’t right. I said at that point, ‘Never again.’ I wanted her home with me.”
Now, over 30 years later, Mary and Lee look back feeling they’ve given April the best life they can, gathering available resources and making compromises. Mary, for one, stopped working. The Respite Inn has been vital to this delicate balance, giving them regular monthly weekend care breaks, if only to rest.
“I don’t even get a full night’s sleep. I haven’t for over 30 years except for when April goes to The Respite Inn,” Mary said. “April is demanding. Everything about her. You can’t get angry at her. I deal with it. What else am I going to do?” In recent years, caring for April has become more challenging as Lee has been losing his sight and is now legally blind.
“Respite makes all the difference in the world,” she said. “I’m getting older and I need more help than ever. I’m just as committed to April. And I know the day will come when I can’t do it. But for now, the longer I have respite, the longer I can keep her at home.”
http://vimeo.com/79951809
